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"The reward of a thing well done

is to have

done it.”

 

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

 

 

Conflict Resolution Techniques

 

Staying Cool in the Clutch

Getting comfortable being uncomfortable

 

Through simulations, you can imagine your way to success and make the unfamiliar, familiar.

  • Focus on what you can control; how you play the game rather than winning or losing

  • Write down one to three goals that you want to accomplish that will increase your chance of success, process not outcome related, specific, controllable, positive.

  • Share them with someone as you commit to your goals.

  • Put the paper inside your shoes, pockets, or somewhere close.

  • When the game or task is over, read your goal and know you held to your commitment.

 

Cooling Off Hotheads

Be aware of threatening situations and plan how to handle irate individuals.

  • Stand or sit slowly and calmly.  Listen attentively and do not interrupt.

  • Be polite and listen attentively, let them vent.  Call your backup person or security.

  • Acknowledge how important the issue is and reflect it to them “Here’s what I heard you say…is that correct?”  Then offer choices “Here’s what we can do…”

  • Re-explain what you will do with a follow-up time and place as you escort them to the door or the appropriate person for help.

  • End the conversation politely.

  • Report and document the event.

 

Mediating Conflict

 

Use the Conflict Resolution Covenant:  “We agree to…”

  • Attack the problem not each other.

  • Focus on things we can do.

  • Not place blame.

  • Collect the facts.

  • Own our problems.

  • Listen to understand.

  • Take the time we need.

  • Encourage and respect each other and our ideas.

Prepare:  Gather the facts, be neutral, and relate the problem to their performance.

  • Start by stating the problem as a mutual one to be solved, not a win-lose struggle.  Get agreement on this before continuing.

  • Ask each person to share his version of the problem, stating only the facts.

  • Ask each person to state the other person’s viewpoint.

  • Ask each person to confirm the accuracy of the restatement

  • Ask each person to suggest a solution…negotiate.

  • Ask each person to restate their agreement.

  • Schedule a follow-up meeting

Tough Love

Helping fellow employees cope in the workplace

 

Employees bring two types of problems:

 

Personal Problems:  Let the employee vent.  Just be a sounding board for them to say what they need to say.  Beware that too much time here will enable a victim mentality.  Let them say what they need to say, then it's back to work.

 

Performance Problems:  Listen, collect data, ask for solutions, and offer resources.  When work is not getting done, you need to understand why.  Listen to what they have to say, identify the level of performance and any roadblocks they may be experiencing.  Then you can effectively start to look for solutions.

 

Maintain the Three R’s of Good Management

Resist

Resist the urge to offer advise right away.  Help them grow through discovery.

Resources      

Build knowledge and skills through training and development opportunities.

Refer

Use other and better sources of help and support.

 

Improve Your Listening Skills by

  • Develop an active listening posture.

  • Eliminate annoying habits.

  • Keep your emotions in check.

  • Ask questions.

  • Don’t jump to conclusions.

  • Try to stay focused.

Inhibitors To Listening

  • People don’t always say what they mean.

  • People don’t always understand their own feelings.

  • It’s sometimes difficult to put into words.

  • The same words have different meanings for different people.

  • We sometimes hear only what we want to hear.

  • People are thinking about what they are going to say next.

Professional development workshops

 

 

“Ernest brings to the table methods that create real solutions and supports the implementation of those solutions.

I highly recommend his services.”

- Noel Eggebraaten

Vice President

School Specialty, Inc.

 

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